Invitation Etiquette- Words to live by
As a stationery company specializing in wedding invitations, one of the first and certainly one of the most frequent questions we're asked from all sorts of couples is how to word their invitations. So many couples today have family circumstances that can often times turn something that should be fairly simple, into something quite complex and confusing. In addition, there is the ever present fear of unknowingly offending a loved one. For generations past it was simple, the bride (or groom's) family hosted and they sent out the invitations on behalf of their betrothed son or daughter. However for some time now a great number of couples today are either hosting their own weddings, or its a joint effort on behalf of their betrothed son or daughter. However for some time now a great number of couples themselves and either one, or both sets of parents. The other common question put to us is do we have samples of wording couples can choose from, and of course we're happy to offer as much help as possible. Here are just a few samples of commonly used wording for both couples hosting, parents hosting or both;
A) Couple HostingIt is with great joy that we
Angelina Jolie
&
Brad Pitt
invite you to share in a
exchange our marriage vows
Saturday, the Twenty-eight of August,
Two thousand and ten at two o'clock in the afternoon
B) Parent's Hosting
and
Mr. and Mrs. Danny De Vito
request the honour of your presence
at the marriage of their children
and
Mark Peter De Vito
on Saturday, the Ninth of June
Two Thousand and Ten
at Three O'clock in the afternoon
St. Mary's Church
Calgary, Alberta
C) Both Couples and Both Parents Hosting (This can also be used in situations where parents are divorced)
Michelle Williams
and
Spike Jonze
together with their parents
invite you to join them
in celebrating their marriage
on Saturday, the Sixth of June
Two Thousand and Ten
at Five O'clock in the evening
St. Michael's Church
London, Ontario
We'd also like to share with you a short list of dos and don'ts when working out the details of your invitations. Again these aren't hard and fast rules, but rather helpful guidelines.
1. Recognize who is hosting the wedding. If parents are involved, then ask them (don't assume) if they would like their names on the invitations. If there is a deceased parent that you want very much to acknowledge, you have the option of including their name on the invitation OR giving them special recognition in the wedding program.
2. If children are no invited, the envelope should be addressed to the individual part only. Such as Mr. and Mrs. Tom Hanks, as opposed to Mr. and Mrs. Tom Hanks and Family.
3. Children over the age of 18 should receive their own invitations (at your discretion!)
4. Please ensure you put postage on the R.S.V.P envelopes to ensure a speedy reply from your guests.
5. While wedding party attendants and parents may not require an official invite, it is considered polite to ensure they receive on.
6. Never indicate "cash only please" or even registry information on your invitation. Registry information can be saved for wedding shower invitations or have your family pass and spread the word. The actual words "Cash only please" should never be used anywhere. Again, this is best handled by having your family and friends spread the word.
7. Invitations should be sent out approximately 10 weeks prior to the wedding date. This is by no means carved in stone, but we find more and more couples today want to give their guests plenty of notice to plan and save the date.
8. Request R.S.V.P's back approximately 3-6 weeks prior to your date. You will want to follow up on those that may be delayed in responding, and enough time to allow yourself to finalize plans once you know exactly how many guests to expect.
9. Outer envelopes (an envelope that encompasses another envelope with the invitation and R.S.V.P card inside), are seldom seen except in cases of very formal occasions.
10. While it may be personal to address each envelope yourself as proper etiquette would indicate, today's trends indicate a more casual approach is equally acceptable by having envelopes digitally printed with your guests names and addresses.
There are dozens of variations on wording and etiquette tips for just about any situation imaginable, unfortunately far too many to include here. However, take heart, we are more than happy to help you find just the right words, the right way, to say, "WE'RE GETTING MARRIED!"
Lisa Davis-Treleaven
Stationary Designer
Big Orange Designs
www.bigorangedesigns.com
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